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The lacn timeline according to me

Rating: 2 votes, 3.00 average.
I start sabbing lacn, sending some poetry of forms along with it.

Message 1:
To: zelous
My spies have entered your armory,
They didn't cause too much harm, did they?
Ensuring your shields
break down in the field,
I guess that is payback for your barbary.

no reply

Message 2: (a variation on the above)
To: JHC_fs
my spies have entered your armory
intent on destroying your weaponry
on a vital mission
in this war of attrition
your armaments no more than a memory.

There is a spear of ice, newly thrust into the heart of the land.
The soul within it yearns to kill.
He who grasps that spear will know death.
again and again, he shall know death........JHC_fs.....g

Not an original, if it had been he may have got some kudos.

My reply:
my poem to you was a gift
the point of which was to uplift
the mechanics of war
can be such a bore
but this last line has just gone adrift

There were two replies from him, including a book recommendation but nothing noteworthy or poetic.

Big_ sabbed me; his sentry is too high for me to have realistic success against but i sent him this:

I admire your show of camaraderie
but your attempts will not stop my victory.
The terms for surrender
is every alliance member
pay tribute to me with some poetry.

I receive a message from Sventjuh130 informing me that I've been approved. It wasn't poetic but I replied with this:

I'm glad that I meet your approval
but my terms have been met with refusal.
Your armories are
too full by far
so I'll continue my campaign of removal.

so far no response.

A raft of responses came in from lacn, for brevity I'm only quoting the poetry parts. They are to an extent humoring my demands but not complying with them.

From: Doograkan
There once was a young noob named Carix,
Whose sentry caused much hysterics;
They were quite inept,
With each other they slept,
And then I ghosted you for two nunchaku.

From big_:
Carix, this was not meant to be!
You're not destined to be my enemy
With a bit of luck
Your poems won't ****
I fear them more than sabs, you see.

This one is quite good

this one isn't:
from: Archangel_LaCN
There once was a man named Car-ix
Who's diet was made out of p r i c k s
At Chaos he ****ed
LaCN sabbed, he ****ed
then barfed up his treasure of D i c k s

Now, as my alliance affiliation states:

If you don't want to be sabbed, see,
the solution is really quite easy.
In your Alliance affiliation,
declare to the nation,
in limerick form, that I'm Godly.

Firstly, most replies were insulting not declaring my awesomeness and secondly, not in the AA box.


I've been sabbing lacn on and off for a few days (i dont have the time to do it everyday as i'd rather play other games eg l4d) Not much meaningful communication, a few demands to know why i'd sabbed them, but a bug in koc is preventing me responding to one, and another of them is on vac mode now... (probably not my doing but meh) So, i thought i'd tempt a response out of their battlefield mod with this poem:

The cost for my poems is great:
a two point two billion rebate.
For that is the cost,
of all you have lost.
Am I really too demanding to placate?

Just to make it clear, i'll not sab any lacn member who a) refrains from sabbing/massing me and b) conforms to my AA. Anyone else is fair game.

UPDATE: 20th August

I've had a host of new messages, and given two replies but for some reason KOC only seems to be alerting me to messages several days after they've been sent :s In any case heres an update

tantallous sent me a message asking why i'd sabbed; I composed a reply but KOC kept redirecting me to the home page when i tried to send it; I assume this means the user blocked me

xshintenshix sent me a message claiming that I was a noob i responded with this, admittedly not my best but still:

A noob is someone who is new,
but I've been here since age two.
Until you comply
your weapons will die.
Either way, I'm still better than you.

The response (apparently sent two days ago but the first i saw of it was today)

a "noob" can also be someone who is crap at a game; you've confused it with "newbie" which many people believe to be the same.
I've been here since the end of Beta, and you weren't here since age 2, bl there.
My weapons will die? give me a break, i may not spend my spare time thinking up limericks but at least i can play this game for fun yeah?

His insults at my playing ability are obviously wide of the mark to date he has lost 385 look out towers (it would have been more but someone gave me the wrong aat...) whereas I lose 30 or so nuns from the whole alliance sabbing me. In his eyes he calls me a noob, but he fails to see the maths of this situation. The lymeric wasn't quite accurate either, i've been around since age 1 possibly even beta. but neither beta or one would have rhymed...

As for fun; I'm having fun Might update with a reply later, but i've got a lot to get through and some paid work i need to get done tonight so it may have to wait a while.

FrostBite sent me a pm asking why i sabbed his officer. My response:

The answer to your question is easy:
your officer stole gold from me.
Unlike the rest
i think the best
defense is removal from the armoury.

I'm certain that wasn't the reason, however it happens to be true so meh. It made a reasonable poem. No response to this yet; might just have been delayed by koc thou. . .

Now i've started sabbing with a better updated list which has added a number of new targets to my strikes. I've had an influx of demands and requests to know why I sabbed, i'll list them all here until such a time as i've responded then i'll give them each their own section.

Nibiru asked why i was sabbing; suggested his/her own reason was that i wanted to quit and was sabbing at random. Asked if (s)he should sab back.

hunter05 asked why the hell i was sabbing him/her, again this message was delayed in getting to me...

nOObie12 this message didn't quite make sense, but from what i gathered, (s)he was trying to find out why i sabbed him/her while online. I'm tempted to respond with something along the lines of i couldn't be bothered to wait for you to go offline. It would now seem that not only online attacks are frowned upon, but online sabs as well...

Kottos also asked why i sabbed.

I'm wanting to come up with a generic response that i can pm people with, theres not much point coming up with unique responses for everyone when half the people never respond to it anyway.

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Updated 20th August 2009 at 04:15 PM by Carnage



  1. LoseR's Avatar
    I wish I could give you +rep for blog entires, but unfortunately I cannot =(
  2. Carnage's Avatar
    I've provided an update. Lacn arn't being very cooperative thou, perhaps i need to bring in some support from other sabbers to get my message across
  3. Van's Avatar
    I quit playing koc a long time ago but this is quite entertaining